I initially saw all 3 beds as cribs which just made it funnier

Oh hey I actually didn’t know that was a Teddy Roosevelt quote til I googled it just now. I just thought it was some kind of proverb

Dude please please please don’t let Trump ruin your marriage. Not allowing your MIL to stay for her annual visit when your wife wants her to is gonna be a big big problem

Comparison is the thief of joy

If trophies and honors are what he needs in order to do the right things then I’m down to gradually award him a whole EGOT over the next 3 years

Ok Zoomer

Move to ED! YMMV based on the hospital but there’s a lot less butt wiping, meds are rarely refused, family shuts up and listens if the patient is critical enough, security is more available if patients get rowdy. Plus you get fun emergency stuff